Voice Comment: (206) 338-ONG-9
:: download file :: listen on iPhone ::
Duration: 58:06 | 53.6MB | Stereo |
Responding to Whitney’s message. Living with people who disagree with us. Responding to Obama’s selection of Rick Warren.
Ongline #302 I Love You, But…
21 Comments
Submit a Comment
About
Ongline Podcast documents the life of a gay Malaysian-born Chinese American. Immerse yourself in the life of a not-so-typical individual. Expand your horizon by experiencing the topics, issues, stories, and simply, the life of a gay Asian man. Until now, the voice of a minority individual has not been this loud!
Subscribe
Old Episodes
Subscribe to old shows using this feed:
Just listeeeeeeening! Omg, I was so out of breath when I was leaving that message. I clearly was scared to death that you would kill me for being so honest and sharing my thoughts with you. lol. But, the way I figured, real friends share thoughts and feelings with you..and I guess that was my reasoning for that.
To clarify the part you were wondering about, you actually hit it on the head…it does conflict with your upbring and what you were brought into since the day you were born. Thats something that is pretty hard to deal with…and yet, you dont have the means to turn someone away simply because they do things different than you, ya know? I was always shunned in school as a child and as an adult today, for NOT being the typical “Black Ghetto Girl” who speaks on an ebonic level and the I.Q. of a grape. Being called too “high and might white” for speaking clearly…sometimes I do, sometimes I dont, its a mix. lol! But, I have learned over time to EMBRACE the fact that I am so different, and if people HATE me for it, then oh well. But, if people can respect, even if they dont agree, with me on who I am, then life is good and thats all I can ask for.
So, I hope that kinda explained…the teachings, in all honesty, never come to my mind. I guess its just..the upbringing. I think thats the best way to explain it even though its very hard to do so. I tend to go all over the place. Heck, as I am typing this, its 4:43am. lol! I gotta go to bed…
Gosh, I totally missed answering your question! To anwser that…I guess, I would be surprised just as you were by my feelings, but not angry AT ALL. Seriously. It would actually make me go into a giggle fit! But, if that person has had or was taught to find black people a sort of “Distaste” in their eyes…but, found me to be one to stand out from the constant stereotype that they met…I guess it would be a bittersweet compliment. lol!
Do I disagree with your being gay or your act of it…I honestly…and you made me think…I dont know..what to feel or think about that. Its not a bad thing or anything like that…its just…I dont know what to feel or think about that. I guess the best way to say it would be the NOT that you act on it, but just the act. Does that make sense? I THINK…thats what I am trying to say. Hmmm..I feel like I am in between…ya know?
I had th think about my second post. I just dont know if its the act or the act of doing. Neitehr or bothers me at all. Yet, I dont know which brings that discomfort that you spoke about. It was never something that came to mind when I spoke about homosexuality.
I do think that its horrible for the prop8 thing is denying you to do what you want…and I agree that its not equal. I do believe that you have the right to do whatever you please. Marry whome ever you want. It shouldnt matter. Do you see how I just fall inbetween? I dont know why I am like that…but, I hope that you can make better sense of it than I can…
Im typing as I listen to your podcast. Not using my religion..in all honesty…I wouldnt vote for prop8. Who am I to judge you for what you do in your life? I didnt give birth to you. I dont go and tell you what to feel, how to feel, and what to do. I wouldnt vote prop 8.
For the white and black thing…well, I would so turn it around and say something like, “Well, after being enslaved for 400 years, we probably would have the given right to feel like we shouldnt be apart of them…so, it doesnt hurt that you feel that way.” lol! As wrong as that sounds, it would be something that I would say, ONLY because I never liked being apart of the in-crowd, no matter what race they were. NOT because of race, I just like being unlike everyone else…does that explain it better?
Oh, and one more thing…I really hope I didnt “slap” you in the face…I would surely feel like the most horrible person in the world…if I knew that I did that to you…even though it was unintensional.
OMG. Whitney, I didn’t mean to suck up all the energy of yours to have you replied me in such details. But I appreciate that. I think if I only made you think. Even though you may not decide one way or another, my job is done.
And seriously, thanks for being so open to listening and trying to understand on things you may not have brought up understanding.
(In continuation from my novel long comments. lol!)
For the white and black thing…well, I would so turn it around and say something like, “Well, after being enslaved for 400 years, we probably would have the given right to feel like we shouldnt be apart of them…so, it doesnt hurt that you feel that way.” lol! As wrong as that sounds, it would be something that I would say, ONLY because I never liked being apart of the in-crowd, no matter what race they were. NOT because of race, I just like being unlike everyone else…does that explain it better?
In regards to Whitney’s remarks saying religious wars and atheism on the same sentence, atheists have NEVER been involved in religious wars precisely because atheists don’t believe in a god.
I applaud Zillafag for being passionate about being an atheist. It is more difficult in this society to admit that you don’t believe in a god. I really don’t care if Whitney is offended. Christians like her have offended me so many times, I’m not about to start being careful with what I say with people like her.
If someone says to me that he/she loves me but disagrees with my being a homosexual. It’s like saying I don’t agree with you being Asian. It doesn’t make any sense. Life is too short for me to waste time with family and friends who can’t love me and my being as a whole. I have drawn the line. I can only have relationships with people where homosexuality is a non-issue in a religious or cultural sense. And you know what, my life is richer for it.
Love ya, John!!!
Obama’s choice of Warren is despicable and Obama’s excuse is unacceptable.
Would anyone accept that excuse if he picked a racist?
i don’t think religion should play any part in a state ceremony to begin with. But with a populace of an estimated 303,824,640, surely Obama could have made a better choice.
Still lovin’ ya’, John!!!
Marco, I am not about to insult you the way you have insulted me. I was just simply stating my feelings on my side of the road..and the “hateful” christians that you have met, I am NOTHING like them, which is what I stated. So, your first mistake there was letting past anger from other idiots dictate what the rest of who dont speak to you in that manner, make judgement for those who are simply stating an opinion. That was all I was trying to do and I’m sorry that you find me to be the type of person, whom you dont even know from a can of paint, less than human. By the way, I love asian men (Did a video about black and asian men on youtube. Just thought I would throw that in there.).
But, you are just like any other person. Before you even ASKED me what makes me feel the way I do, or why, you already planted me into a group of people are there to condemn you just for you being you. Is it wrong for me to be a christian? No. Is it wrong for you to be gay? No. I never said anything along those lines. But, I am not hear to prove anything to you or anyone else. But, just like you have disrgarded me as someone not worth associating with, which is your hate speaking for you, I’m going to disregard your comment towards me. You and I have one thing in common, we both dont have to worry about the other because we both dont NEED to know each other.
Thats ok that you hate me for me being me. I can’t change that and I wont lose sleep over it. But, its people like John who can see the realness in me, the genuiness in me to not throw me in a hole of people because of bad experiences, is why I am so drawn to him.
Marco, you have no right what so ever to try to make me feel bad about my upbringing. I dont regret being who I am and neither you or John should feel regret for being who you are. I made that clear. But, you would have caught that had you not picked parts just to find something to insult me with, which is really sad on your part and it shows your character. I kept this at an adult level and what did you do? You made it bigger than it should be. Because of John’s response to me, I see things in a whole new light that I never have seen before. But, you will never know that and I wont allow someone who think the way you do make me feel bad for what my family has bestowed on me.
To John:
I’m sorry for causing so much trouble and hate on your show. I guess its not worth me saying anything if its going to make a rukus and I wasnt trying to start anything. I guess I felt a little too comfortable sharing things on your show such as this topic. I wont do that again. But, I will continue to listen.
Oh, and one more thing, Marco. I wasnt saying becareful to NOT SAY ANYTHING around other christians. I’m just saying, becareful saying anything that you are intending to come to as a religious fighit anything. You and I both know that there are people who will try to come after for that and WONT DO what I did in not taking things in an emotional level. Give me credit for one thing, Marco, and this maybe very hard for you do. Give me credit for not behaving like those that have irked you in the way that I see it. You are angry. Your whole comment towards me is seething in angry..and I didnt bring nothing of the sort when I called John…whatever it is that has you on some anger trip where you feel the way you do now…let it go. Because NOT SPEAKING ON A SPIRITUAL LEVEL, I can see that its gonna eat you from the inside out. You will miss out on meeting some really special people all because you hold one thing against them. And its such a minor thing,too. I’m not hold anythin against you or John. Just because this topic makes me feel alittle uncomfortable about this, does Not mean that I am going to allow it to miss out on some great human beings simply because we stand on different grounds.
That may sound like a cop out to you…but, I mean that from the heart. I dont hate you, Marco. Infact, I actually admire you for being so outspoken the way you. I am the same way and I guess thats why I called John about this. But, I would never let my outspokeness develop into anger and make me make assumptions about people just because other decided to be stupid towards you. I hope that one day you will realize that not all christians are out there to hang you from a tree…
I quote Whitney’s own words in her voice mail to you: ” . . . granted, in all honesty, even I don’t agree with what your lifestyle is.” I think we all get it and I for one appreciate Whitney’s honesty in her revealing her true feeling about homosexuality here. Her words do not surprise me in the least. She accepts the teaching of her faith that homosexuality is wrong; that it is a sin. I assume Whitney also accepts her faith’s teaching that every sin is forgivable, with the exception of blasphemy? I understand why she believes as she does. It is basically out of ignorance. She believes the bible to be the “Word of God”. She believes the authors of the bible to have been divinely inspired by God to write the words of the Holy Bible. This should show the gay community how difficult it will be to bridge the gap between Gays and the Church. For Christians to fully accept the gay community would be to deny the teachings of the Holy Bible or at least to deny their inerrancy. Mainstream christians will never change their mind on these issues. We can only hope, that with time many who were believers will finally come to realize that the promises of old were nothing but lies. That there will be no final judgment. That Jesus Christ died on the cross and was no resurrected. That there is no after life; there is no punishment for being bad or reward for being good. That we have but one life. We should live that one life well. Treat everyone with respect and help continue human existence by being good stewards of this good earth. Peace and Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and love be with you all.
Thats what I was trying to say, Nick. I just never wanted to tell a “pretty lie” over the “ugly truth” about my feelings. And heck, if my beliefs make me ignorant on certain things that I dont understand..then, I cant pretty much help that. I am who I am…and I hate the feeling of confrontation.
But, I will admit that I regret bringing this topic up. It wasnt my intention to rub any of you the wrong way…and I guess I have. So, I dont feel comfortable saying anything anymore. I’ll just listen. But, I have learned alot this past day and a half…that in itself, for me, is a blessing.
I never prayed not to be gay. I love being gay. I kept it to myself in my youth out of fear of being mistreated. I think I made a wise choice in my early days in keeping my gayness a secret. It was not out of shame. I knew I was gay when I discovered sex and knew that the thought of having sex with a woman was revolting to me. Not meaning to hurt anyone here. Just wanting to tell the truth about how I feel about all this. I’ll probably have to talk about all this in tomorrow’s podcast now that I heard all this tonight. Oh well . . .
oh my Whitney, don’t stop talking. It is this kind of dialog which is helpful in being about better understanding between people.
Hmm…well, I still apologize for saying anything.
that should be . . . “bringing about a better understanding between people.”
I can’t understand why anyone stays in the church. I think they are just to afraid to take a chance on hell. Burning for all eternity does tend to make one think twice before disobeying the purported “word of God”. John you kill me. You need to seek a job in the Obama administration as a diplomat between the Gay community and the church. John, I love you but, you are such a silly boy.
Remember John. They think we can change. They think we choose to be gay. They believe the bible to be the “word of God.” It is hard to fight God. He was (after-all) the creator of all things for God’s sake! Until you can walk in my shoes do not assume anything about me choosing to be gay! I do not know why I am gay, but I would never want to change my sexual orientation. The ones that do wish to change do so (I would suppose) because it can be very difficult to go against the grain of what is accepted as “normal”. We are different and I celebrate that difference in that it has made me more accepting of others. I hurt when others are hurt. I wish we could all live together in peace and love. But I’m realistic enough to know that it will never be. And that knowledge depresses me.
Celebrate Diversity – it would be a boring place to live if we all thought alike.
I agree, Nick. Especially, since its christmas. Thats suppose to be the one time where the world is sincere to each other…wish it was like that all the time.