Tach?ɬ© – my princess

Tach?ɬ©

Last Friday, we discovered a drop of blood in Tach?ɬ©’s urine. I immediately sent her to the vet that morning. After some urine and blood tests and further x-rays, the vet discovered that she has an abnormally enlarged kidney. With all the tests, our vet thinks that it’s an indication of lymphoma. But to be certain, we scheduled for a sonogram to get a better look at her internally.

Today, early in the morning, we sent her back to the vet for the sonogram and a tissue test, and both results confirmed that it is indeed lymphoma, which is a form of cancer.

The unwelcoming news is obviously devastating to Bruce and I. But we are focused on doing what’s best for her. So that she can live the rest of her life as comfortable and as best we can provide to her.

We are at a point where we have to decide if we want to put her on chemo therapy or should we just let her live the rest of her life with the least level of stress and at the maximum level of comfort. The decision isn’t easy. We have yet to come up with one concretely. We are leaning toward the latter. (She is next to me cleaning herself. We’re sharing a couch.)

Our vet already told us that surgery is already too late. Even if we were to give her chemo, it is merely going to prolong her life for weeks or perhaps months.

We try to make the best decision for her, and not selfishly for us.

What’s painful for me personally is thinking about having to send her to the vet when she’s too weak to live or suffering too much. The dilemma of wanting her with us and wanting the best for her. Taking her to the vet for the very last time is very painful for me. I dread the day. But I know that the day will come. It’s just a matter of how soon.

We will have to sit on this decision for at least another day.

UPDATED minutes later:
After reading what I just wrote, and looking at Tach?ɬ© just being her good old self next to me, I realized perhaps I should focus more on her life and the time I have with her now. Otherwise, it’s a waste of her time.

Sleepy Ball

Suze on George W. Bush. You go girl!

From?Ǭ†WWD ISSUE 03/20/2009

Suze Orman

Suze Orman

Photo By Marc Royce

Her populist rage is just as pronounced off-camera. Sitting in a green room after her TV interviews, she lambasts everyone from Alan Greenspan to Larry Summers to the former president of the United States, who holds an especially dark place in her heart. ?¢‚Ǩ?ìCommander in Chief??¢‚Ǩ¬ù she says of George W. Bush, with a mix of disbelief and scorn. ?¢‚Ǩ?ìYou blew up every single financial vessel we had and if you think you aren?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t personally responsible, well, the blame starts at the top. There is no higher top than you, SIR! If I were you, I would feel so absolutely horrific that I would take every penny I had and distribute it to anybody and everybody to help them in whatever way I could. You owe the American people every penny of your fortune and your family?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s fortune.?¢‚Ǩ¬ù

Read the whole article here.

Being gay is not to be spoken… or heard

I’m all for equal rights for everyone. Sometimes I have to remind myself that the road we have to fight for equality is long and hard, but don’t forget to be thankful for we have achieved and be grateful to those who fought for our rights today.

In some Asian TV broadcasts, even the word “gay” or “lesbian” are considered offensive to some.

Read the article from AP.

Create your Will & Trust for free now

This is merely one of the many inequality that I have to face as a gay man. My partner and I do not get the same rights as everyone else simply because in this country, we are not allowed to get married. And therefore, we are missing out on a lot of financial protections that our straight counterparts enjoy.

Suze Orman, an honestly out lesbian said so on her show that it is a “travesty”. But she is not just all talk, she has given a promo gift code to everyone, gay or straight, to create their trust and will for free.

Go to this site:
https://www.suzeormanwillandtrust.com/giftcode/
Use the Promo Code: People First

Until we all have the same rights, it is very important for you to do this to protect your partner or loved ones.

A Tale of my 12-year-old Wallet

Holy Wallet!

Twelve years ago, when I was still a student in the USA, I went back to Malaysia during my summer break. I also visited Mei Chi in Singapore, a friend that I know for the longest period of time (I guess I have to be careful using the world old). She was my neighbor. We started playing together when we were about four years old. We became good friends since then.

When I visited her in Singapore, she realized that I had an old and completely beat up wallet. The next day when I met her in front of Starbucks, she gave me this Esprit wallet. I was very touched. I took great care of it. It has never been on my butt. My beat-up wallet was molded into the shape of my right butt cheek. So, when I started using this one, I decided not to ever put my wallet in my back pocket.

Last few months, I observed some obvious tears and ripped seams on the wallet. Yesterday, I finally went out and bought a cheap Wal-mart wallet to replace this one. (I don’t usually shop at Wal-mart. I had a $50 gift card that I needed use up before it expired. The wallet was only $12.48. Made in India. I hope not child labor)

It was hard to part with this old wallet. But I’m also glad that my belongings won’t fall out from it. The wallet was easily replaceable. But the story behind the wallet will never ?Ǭ†be replaceable.?Ǭ†

I am keeping the wallet for now. I’m sentimental like that. It reminds me of my good friend Mei Chi. I just can’t chuck that out.

I hope by writing down my thoughts about this wallet, and by taking some photos of it would allow me to share with everyone how special this wallet has been to me. It really doesn’t matter which wallet I’m using, Mei Chi will always be my oldest friend. 🙂

Peace to All

There has been so many levels (the world down to my own site) of noise and chaos. Realistically, we all need to face that every day. But I hope you will take a moment and think of your ultimate goal of doing what you do. At the end of the day, it’s hard to argue that we want love and peace.

I wish you all peace and love. Our conversations will continue, but don’t let us get distracted or hurt by losing our focus on our bigger goal. Again, love and peach to all.

Wreaths

Quite Natural for Me

Pope: Homosexuality is Unnatural

He is going to cause a lot of pain and sufferings by saying this. But it is also in these pains and sufferings that we will claim our place in justice and love.
I always have faith in love.

Hey Pope, you might want to spend more time taking care of all those priests who molested children, and how the church deliberately cover up the stories. And don’t even try scapegoating us with this issue. No one is believing your ass.

Equality has no exceptions

Does Barack Obama’s pick of Rev Rick Warren also reflects his own view? His cabinet’s view?

Sure it does!

Rev Warren isn’t bad. He is just wrong. But if we continue to let little things like this slip by, we will never achieve equality. There is no room for exceptions when it comes to equality. Equal is equal. You have all the freedom to be wrong and discriminatory in your own church. But we are not talking about a religious marriage. This is my human right. I suggest Rev. Warren go back to the history of marriage and ?Ǭ†he’ll be delighted to find out that?Ǭ†polygamy?Ǭ†was totally fine, if he insists on his thousands of years of marriage history.

In this YouTube video he claims he’s not homophobic. I believe him. He is just wrong (in comparing same-sex marriage to incest and?Ǭ†pedophilia). How about hearing that same comment made about interracial marriages 40 years ago? And the same made about interracial marriages today?

I would still have voted for Obama if I had the right to vote in November. But I will not let this sort of stance made at my expense. Obama and his future administration needs to make this right. He of all people should know about this, having come from a interracial parents.?Ǭ†

I don’t blindly support Obama. There will be more to come, I am sure of that.

About

Ongline Podcast documents the life of a gay Malaysian-born Chinese American. Immerse yourself in the life of a not-so-typical individual. Expand your horizon by experiencing the topics, issues, stories, and simply, the life of a gay Asian man. Until now, the voice of a minority individual has not been this loud!

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